Fra en hospitalsseng

Noter fra et kort hospitalsophold (blev indlagt i torsdags, fik rekonstrueret forreste korsbånd i venstre knæ – og blev udskrevet fredag). Skrevet torsdag, i morfinrus:

Operation seems to have gone fine. And then i got a bottle of morphine and a button i could control myself. Nice feature

I have to stay overnight. Irritating as I can’t work here, the keyboard and the internet connection is shite (this takes forever to write). but i guess it makes sense what with the pain and the drugs. Am trying to watch a film but keep nodding off. They almost did not want to let me use the toilet by myself, thinking i might faint, so it was either a bottle in bed or an escort. A nurse followed me there, me on crutches, she carrying the bottles that are attached to me, one with the morphine, one for the blood coming out of the knee. but at least she left while i was peeing.

Funny by the way. the day nurse was a sweet woman. the night nurse, however, is a big, bald man. who came in, looked at me and said: “I know you…”

“Is that good or bad? From where?” I asked. but he didnt explain, letting me wonder how he knows me; does he carry a chip on his shoulder, have i done something to him? Weird , I dont remember him. maybe the morphine is messing with my mind.

Anyway. He then went on to explain that i needed to take some antiinflammatory medicin: “Do you want tablets to swallow or the alternative?”

Me: “What is the alternative?”"
Him: “To be put up your bum.”
Me: “Ah, yeah I dont think…”
Him: “Dont worry, we’ll do it for you.”
Me: “Yeah, no I’ll just take the ones I can swallow, thanks…”

All in all, though , they are nice here. But I long to get out. oh well, better get some rest now.

Jesus. Another nurse just came in: “Are you roman catholic?”

Me: ‘Ehm… why?’
Her: ‘A priest will come by tomorrow.’
Me: ‘ What, I am dying now?! The last oil?’
Her: ‘No no, it’s just the holy communion.’ (or something)
Me: ‘Well I’m not catholic. But thanks.’

Maybe it’s just me but this is kind of weird. And outside some goddamn brass band is playing away in the street. Loudly and badly, Typically Maltese.